Saturday 22 July 2017

WINTER WILDNESS

There's a verse from Psalm 23 that's familiar to many - 'He leads me beside still waters ...' a reminder that our God knows our need for rest and refreshment and is always willing to help us find a way of taking some time out.
But it wasn't still waters that spoke to me on my walk today.  Instead the waters were wild, wavetops swept back like a certain president's hair, foam popping up in the shallows, water crashing  as sea-surge met reef.

I've always been drawn to the sea when it's wild like this - perhaps it's because I've never been 'wild' and I can see in it a freedom and chaotic beauty which I did not experience for my first few decades.
I was a compliant child, keen for approval, not wanting to step out of line in case the emotional support I so needed dried up. I never had hair long enough to be blown all over the place in the wind; I never put myself at risk of being in seas too hard for me to handle, in water  - or in situations - which were out of my depth.

 But over the last twenty years or so, actually since I was ordained priest, something interesting has been happening - the  fledgling wildness within - tiny by some people's standards, has been growing :  expressing itself in more of a willingness to stand up, to speak out, and not to worry overly about what others might think. I've repeatedly been invited to step out  beyond the cliched 'comfort zone' and pick up opportunities that test me and sometimes frighten me but which always push me further in my trust journey with Jesus. Time and time again, I've found the faithful provision of  his Loving Presence is  enough to get me through. And the wildness within - the desire to play - the appreciation of others' capacity to work on the margins - continues to draw me, challenge me.


It's not plain sailing of course. I can still be influenced by others not to 'walk on the wild side' - I noticed it when I was on holiday recently - there was part of me that REALLY wanted to try the flying fox - a 250m journey quite high up through the rain forest in Queensland.  I'd never done anything like that before but I looked at the others enjoying the adventure and I was ready to give it a go, until I let myself be persuaded by someone who loves me and wants to keep me safe, not to take the risk.   But I did try out the children's version later that day!

As we explore some of the riches of the contemplative Christian tradition, as we allow the Spirit to transform our inner being, we discover more of our true selves and begin to know the glorious freedom of the children of God.

In the New Zealand Prayer Book  [p.186] there's a lovely blessing that reads :

The blessing of God
the eternal goodwill of God, 
the shalom of God, 
the wildness and the warmth of God, 
be among us and between us, now and always. 

The 'wildness and warmth' of God - now there's something to contemplate. Enjoy!

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