a day to remember

Twenty years ago, on 15th October 1994, I was ordained priest by Bishop David Moxon on the Feast Day of St Teresa of Avila at St Peter's Cathedral in Hamilton. 

I could not have imagined then the adventures which lay ahead: almost immediately came the opportunity to spend a year with my family in Canterbury, Kent studying for an MA in Applied Theology; then came the end of nearly a decade of ecumenical chaplaincy at Taranaki Polytechnic [now WITT]; the beginning of spiritual direction and ministry supervision practice; the responsibility of co-ordinating the Spiritual Directors Formation Programme for Spiritual Growth Ministries [www.sgm.org.nz]; being drawn - unexpectedly, and with great trepidation -  into aged care ministry where I now spend most of my working hours, a ministry which takes more of me than I could ever have imagined, where God sustains me - both on good days when I am a reasonably uncluttered channel of grace and on the 'other' days when my own stuff gets in the way.

Woven into these stretching opportunities were the challenge and amazing joy of going to study at St George's College in Jerusalem,  and the complex process of bringing five books to birth - labour intensive, tinged with moments of panic and moments of great joy when the creativity of the Spirit fired my imagination and lifted me up from the 'miry bog' of writer's block. 

God has sustained me through these past twenty years. Over and over I've been invited to do something that scares or surprises me, something that always stretches me and makes me lean more and more on God's equipping and less and less on my own 'self'. As the years in ordained ministry have unfolded, I've been learning to accept my shadow and acknowledge that I make mistakes - something the perfectionist in me tried so hard for many years to avoid!
[ There is a certain freedom in being old enough now to have genuine 'senior moments' - rather than 'menopausal drift'!] Most importantly though, for me, is coming to know in my innermost being, that I am - just as each person everywhere is - deeply beloved of God. 

As a fatherless child, I've always valued the father love of God deeply so the  Romans 8.15 reading for St Teresa's day, in the Message version is especially apt: 

This resurrection life you received from God is not a timid, grave-tending life. It's adventurous, expectant, greeting God with a child-like,'What's next, Papa?'

No matter what unfolds, what's next, God is with you, with me, with us all.